Sad songs say so much!
Singer songwriters have the coolest job! We have the ability to take our most deepest thoughts, issues, passions, joys, troubles and put them into our songs! Sometimes, these songs become therapy for others. It’s an incredible responsibility to speak into someone else’s life.
HOW A SAD SONG COMFORTED ME
I remember being a teenager and going through my very first heartbreak with my boyfriend at the time. I thought everything was fine between us and I thought we would be together forever. But one day, he showed up at my house and broke up with me unexpectedly.
I didn’t see it coming, I was completely taken by surprise. He didn’t offer any explanation and the way he blurted out that he was breaking up with me nearly destroyed me. Over the next few days, I was emotionally distraught because our breakup felt like my whole world shattered.
For two years, he was my world and we did nothing apart. Now I was back to being alone and feeling like I was fending for myself in life. I felt rejected, lonely and humiliated that he left me for a much older (and uglier) girl. (:>)
At the time, the song “All At Once,” by Whitney Houston was out. Listening to that song, I would cry incessantly. The lyrics described my situation and my experience perfectly. It was as if the writers knew exactly how I was feeling and they wrote this song just in time so that I could wallow in my misery.
Just look at these lyrics! Based on what I just told you, doesn’t it make sense that these lyrics spoke directly to me? The title alone says it all! “All At Once” or in other words suddenly this break up occurred without any notice.
ALL AT ONCE
All at once
I finally took a moment
And I'm realizing that
You're not coming back
And it finally hit me
All at once
All at once
I started counting teardrops
And at least a million fell
My eyes began to swell
And all my dreams were
Shattered all at once
Ever since I met you
You're the only love I've known
And I can't forget you
Though I must face it all alone
All at once
I'm drifting on a lonely sea
Wishing you'd come back to me
And that's all that matters now
All at once
I'm drifting on a lonely sea
Holding on to memories
And it hurts me more than you know
So much more than it shows
All at once
All at once
I looked around and found
That you were with another love
In someone else's arms
And all my dreams were shattered
All at once
"All At Once" Songwriters: Michael Masser + Jeffrey OsborneSAD SONGS ARE ALSO OUR FRIENDS
What is it about sad songs that makes us feel vindicated in our pain? How do they have the power to become a supportive friend of sorrow?
Looking back, I am grateful for the songwriters of “All At Once”. They really understood my pain. Their lyrics pierced my heart, especially each time the 2nd verse came up in the song. The reality and similarity of how I felt was so poignantly sang in the 2nd verse. That line always made me feel like a spear lodged in my heart.
“All at onceI looked around and found that you were with another love; in someone else’s arms. And all my dreams were shattered. All at once.”
They wrote 6 lines that perfectly described my pain. They painted a visual image of the movie I replayed in my mind thinking of him being with his new love.
It seemed like pop radio, at the time, would play this song over and over.
SAD SONGS BRING HEALING
Reflecting on it now, I can see how this song gave me a safe place to empty out my sadness. Had I not spent so much time crying, I would have not been able to pour out and transfer my sadness away from my heart.
Ironically, each time I heard the song on the radio, I cried less and less, until I could cry no more.
There came a point when the song played on the radio and the deep sorrow that engulfed me, no longer suffocated me.
I began to see the light of day and the sting of heartbreak wasn’t as painful. During this healing period, the song was my true friend. It understood what I was feeling, it spoke the same language my heart spoke.
Songwriting heals hearts!
“I began to see the light of day and the sting of heartbreak wasn’t as painful.”
It felt the same emotions I felt. The lyrics and melody gave my heart a voice and passage for the sorrow to escape.
I’ll be honest, when I sat to write this blog, I listened to the song again since I hadn’t heard it in years. I didn’t expect it to do what it did!
Can I tell you that my eyes teared up? The lyrics are still so powerful even 30 years later. I remembered the pain of my 16 year old heart. It is incredible that a song has such power over our memories.
As songwriters, we can’t take it lightly that our words may impact someone else’s life. It is an incredible responsibility to have something you experience and create for your own healing to become healing for someone else’s life.
SIMPLICITY IS KEY
What can we learn from this personal experience? First, I think you should take a moment to look back at the lyrics of “All At Once.” Read it line by line! You’ll notice how the lyrics are so simple and extremely relatable to anyone who has ever experienced heartbreak.
The writers beautifully captured the painful emotions one experiences when someone leaves a relationship unexpectedly.
Their word choices were simple and truthful. There was no hype or flowery wording that would distract the listener from relating to the song.
They didn’t try to make the song more than what it was—a poem turned into a song. They implemented easy to follow lyrics and a rhyming scheme which discreetly cemented its message.
Songwriting Tips
“What can we learn from this personal experience?”
They did a beautiful job at connecting every impacted listener with a message of “we understand what you’re going through; this is what you’re going through.” They didn’t offer advice or what to do to overcome. Their song was simply, “this is what happened and it is what it is.” “There’s no answer we have for you.”
Next time you experience something, whether its positive or negative; implement this strategy of simplicity in telling a truthful story! It will draw your listener in to provide comfort.
Keep your lyrics simple by describing what you’re feeling and experiencing. Don’t use fancy words or hype. Avoid trying to write a song to become a hit. Simply write from the heart! It will take you much farther.
Until next time, keep being amazing,
MRJ